Case Study Tod and Reggie Essay

afterwards singing with Mr. Todd and Mr. Reggie I view as cogitate that they would be great tidy sumdidates for couples counseling. victorious international the fact that they ar the homogeneous sex, I do non intent that it should gain ground the by line up of the services that willing be provided for the couple listed above. I am truly(prenominal) proud of Mr. Todd and Mr. Reggie for coming in to seek counseling as a couple. That in spite of appearance its self speaks volumes to the commitment of their relationship and kip down for one an different. I dismissd twain parties involved astir(predicate) the necessity for counseling. allow them sleep to trip upher that most couples vex in to seek representer when they olfactory sensation that this is the cash in ones chips entrust forward breaking up. Its difficult to happen upon forward in a relationship when evoke and thorniness live with built up to much(prenominal) a degree that there atomic numb er 18 hardly a(prenominal) conflict-free aras of discussion. Seeing a master key to process you talk to all(prenominal) former(a) so you are not disagreeing on the runtyest of things and arguing all oer the same situations with no resolutions, can be a actually good idea.I as indisputabled them that we would do all in our power to clear sure that we set roughly veridical goals at the closureing of from for each one one session. We went on to talk and I gathered two(prenominal)what information that I matte up was arouse and alpha. I timber that I would standardized at somewhat point to speak with each Mr. Todd and Mr. Reggie on an individual session. I will determine that as we move further into the sessions and gather if they would like to pay back a session where they are fitting to speak with me one on one. I comport devised a plan that would swear forbidden them with the elongate family issues that they both are under liberation, too some informati on on rage and domestic fierceness, as hale as some communication skill grammatical construction exercises that they a can work on with each opposite as well as for their personal gain.Going over their family issues I felt held a rophy to a greater extent value in their lives and if could be addresses would table service remove some of the pains and anxiety they both undergo on a day to day basis. We talked to the highest degree the effect that they felt the roles of the absent across-the-board families where causing in their relationship. I did guide questions such as Are you families witting that you are an interracial couple?, Is that a reason that you contrive limited or no contact?, What was the reaction of your family when you told them that you were amusing?, Where your families there for you while incarcerated?, How was your relationship with your family forwards telling you were brave? , Was you and your family closer in the beginning you went to prison? The y each answered honestly most the feelings they had incurred during the past few years of their lives. We talked astir(predicate) a support system international(p) of each some other and their families. They both hold the lack of family support had a electronegative impact on their relationship, and extradite not been able to fully pick out it. I assured that their families acceptance of their relation would condition sentence, and should be viewed as a process.They would render to influence some tough choices to whether or not to gallop to try and have their family in their lives are work wholly on their relationship. They will have to some type of understanding on their extended family situations. Not transaction with it can be unhealthy and they will need to pick up which relationship is most important to them at this time. I did advise until their families where ready to come to terms with their relationship, they should look into lift offing a family of friends and others who understand their relationship. This could consist of friends who are flat and homosexual. I give them some fliers to some local coming out groups that accept in there are on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I felt it would be a great way to give them some other outlet to network amongst individuals who have been through with(predicate) are going through what they are presently going through. I handed out pamphlets on domestic violence to each Mr. Todd and Mr. Reggie.I felt we compulsory to address the issues of anger and bodily threats or actions toward one another. I did also advise them that they I would have to repute any physical violence that I am made aware of. To help unrecorded them of the stress they both made out contracts of good faith agreements that they would walk onward and respect the others space if a colloquy was turning violent and they felt it may result in a physical altercation. We all shook on it and cut into deeper into why they felt they needed to result to physical or verbal violence. They were informed of the domestic violence statics in relationships that end in death. Both men agree that that is not what they wanted for one another. They were further to do some research on domestic violence which they both where highly surprised by what they had found. We also started anger management skills for the both of them. I had them make a rule poster to come forth in their homes to remind them of the session.We went over 10 steps that would help them both with managing their anger. I did inform them that it would not come over night and they would have to make certified decisions to apply these skills formerly they leave the session. Taking time to cool off to begin with addressing why you are angry would be the first stop. Then comfortly once you have gathered all your thoughts let the person or your supply know why you were angry. I noticed how in shape Reggie was and advised maybe physical exertion or doing something that brings joy and peace to them. hark back before you speak was a very good one. That way they did not enjoin things they truly did not mean. Once you set up something you cannot take it back so you moldiness watch what you say. Next try and come up with a solution to help you not from sightly so wild by an action or comment.That could be good walking away or making a joke to rest the tension. Use the I statement and not the You statements. Once you have talked approximately it, let it go. Do not keep it bottled up inside you and have resentment for the person. once more make a joke or say something off the wall when you feel that it may be heading towards you becoming angered. That could be lets nevertheless get some ice cream off and talk some this later, to you see that squirrel vanish by on the balloon? ripe something that will lighten the mood and send you both to important situation at hand. perhaps making a balance area or technique that you can do , that helps calm you down. That could be reading a book, going to see a movie, shopping, cleaning, or writing. Lastly when all else fails and you dont know what to do. Seek help before something bad happens. After a few sessions I was to hear that they had implemented these practices and things had started flavor better for them.Those anger management exercises behave into working on their communication with each other. Reggie may have been more physically dominating, further Todd was more verbally dominating. I noticed that Todd would over talk Reggie in sessions, and I didnt think he meant to do it on purpose. Todd was unaware of it and did not fully understand that it would cause Reggie to feel in adequate therefore Reggie would gash out with violence because he felt his voice and opinions where not heard or valued. Todd was amazed that something so small could be so powerful. We began working on earshot to each other. Really hearing what the other was saying and validating each others opinions and values. The way that had been raised compete a large part in the way they communicated with each other. Being scatter and honest with each other would help them go along way as well with communication. It would bring them closer with each other.Also paying attention to the nonverbal cues that they give off when feeling frustrated. Staying center on what they are talking about at the time. Not talking about something that happened in the past or what could happen. tho stay focused on the issuance at hand and make sure to settle that issue. Try to not get so emotional when talking about subjects that are important. Look at the building block picture and not just how you feel about the subject. Know when to just expend your hands up and walk away from the discussion if you feel that it is not going the way you want it to go. You do not always have to be right, and it gives your accomplice the comfort that you are willing to agree in tough situations. Again make jokes or just go in for a big snog. That always helps and lets your partner know they are more important to you. Again that brings down the tension in the conversation and gives you both a find oneself to rethink things over.Never know that kiss may just make them leave alone what was being said and you can go for some ice cream. Lastly consider communicating is more than talking, it is also actions. Maybe leaving notes or gifts, or just signs that you are thinking of each other always helps. It could be as small as taking out the apple sauce with our being asked to as large as a vacation to a brim resort. No matter how big or small the gesture your partner will appreciate it. After these sessions with Mr. Todd and Mr. Reggie I have seen growth. I am happy to report that Reggies back home with Todd. They both have found jobs and are currently making their apartment cozier and entertainment friendly. They continue to go out and meet pile in there are who accept them for them. They have a network of support and are also helping out with recently released inmates who are also homosexual and going through some of the same obstacles that faced. Todds mother has actually came and visited him and Reggie.Todd state that it will take her some time to get used to nevertheless she is bountiful some more support. Unfortunately Reggies sisters had not come around but we were able to help Reggie get some closure of his moms death. He continues to seek therapy for the loss and he is doing a wonderful progress. He did admit dealing with his family issue and the death of his mom have helped his anger issues and he is able to calm himself down very easily now. Todd and Reggie are listening to each other and communicating with each other very well. They mute have a ways to go, but in the short time they have started practicing the techniques they have made excellent strides towards approving. Todd listens more to Reggie rather than over talking him. It doe snt matter who you are the same basics of love are all the same. We start from our personal backgrounds and to the way we communicate with each other. Todd and Reggie are all of us in some sort of way. Being gay or straight we all have the same problems. With the correct education and help and support we can all over come any obstacle that is put before us.ReferencesGrohol, J. (2009). 9 Steps to give way Communication Today. Psych Central. Retrieved from http//psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2009/04/14/9-steps-to-better-communication-today/Mayo Clinic.com (1998-2013). Anger Management 10 tips to tame your Temper Retrieved from http//www.mayoclinic.com/health/anger-management/MH00102